is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize
