uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize