did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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