Me too!
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Randomize
