So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Come see our sink grown plant.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
