were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I am available for nakedness
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
