No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Text me some of your sweat
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