I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Randomize
