kristin has been a bad kristin
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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