Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Randomize
