I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
There's always time for handjobs
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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