Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
Randomize
