Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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