Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
