dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
They should really pass out barf bags in church
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
