ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
