Please, let me fuck your mom
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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