Just fell off a train. Bad.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
