i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
