Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
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