i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
