So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
