I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
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