Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
