i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
