tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
