I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Vodka?
Forever.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize
