Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
