i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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