After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
