took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
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