Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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