Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Randomize