just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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