Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
