I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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