Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
please come you make the beer taste better
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
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