Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Randomize
