At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Found the puke drawer
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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