Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize