Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Just puked most of my soul out..
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
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