i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
