I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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