I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
