He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Randomize
