Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Randomize
