why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
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So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
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Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
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