i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize
