jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
pop tarts are not kleenex
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
