This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
