Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Randomize
