Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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